The good burghers of Leicester have had a right royal celebration at the discovery of the remains of King Richard III under a council car park in the City. If you’ll further pardon the expression, it remains to be seen where the skeleton is finally laid to rest but there is likely to be a right royal rumpus if he is given a passport out of the City to York or Westminster Abbey. Some kind of horse trading may take place at some point which was of course the case at the Battle of Bosworth itself.
History now tells us that the king’s battlefield cry of “a horse, a horse, my kingdom for a horse” were answered in a way he had not envisaged when he was slung over the animal after being killed and carried off to a resting place in an unmarked grave where he lay undiscovered for centuries.
In all probability, a different type of horse trading has been involved for the good burgers of processed meat. It looks as though quite a few of our equine friends have been also killed and laid to rest in unmarked ready meals before being unearthed after many years. The Galloping Gourmet must be turning in his grave at the thought of it all.
Surprise, surprise – we are now told in no uncertain terms that the accurate labelling of meat products is essential so that consumers know what they are getting for their money. Well, for employers searching for good quality meat, the same applies to job advertisements for new staff. Their focus should always be to maximise the quantity and quality of job applicants that are brought in for processing.
With this in mind, they should contain
- Company name (or recruitment partner’s name if you wish to remain anonymous)
- Search engine friendly descriptions of your business for online applicants
- Company information designed to attract the best calibre of applicant
- Job title (also remembering the need for a search engine friendly title)
- Location and postcode of the job (to elicit more responses than by simply including a region)
- Salary ranges (rather than no pay information at all)
- A brief job description of the role and its responsibilities
- An explanation of the likely attributes of the successful person
- How interested candidates should apply and to whom
- The closing date for all applications
As a result of the recent controversy, no job advertisement should contain any horse related references or traces of horse related jokes. As a result, Qdos is currently reviewing its relationship with our recruitment consultancy, Find Us Staff, and also with our catering suppliers, particularly Shergar and Sons, the sandwich people.
This follows an incident of the trots last week when one of our staff ate a contaminated product but is now in a stable condition. But if you do come across a spare bit of horse in your freezer, there are recipes out there to help you like this old horse stew suggestion.
Take meat of the second class (flank, topside, collar), place in cold water and cook over a gentle fire, removing the foam and grease as you bring it to the boil. Add salt, a clove of garlic, caramelised onion and a colouring of vegetables, such as leek, turnip, celery, cabbage etc. Leave to cook for seven or eight hours on a moderate fire.
Come to think of it, that frozen lasagne doesn’t seem so bad after all. Where’s the microwave?
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